Because of the triple threat match from last week we know that WWE Creative are cowards.. or are letting their creativity be stifled by someone who is afraid to take a shot on a new challenger on a mostly meaningless pay per view.

I know which direction I’d point.

What we also know, in addition to The Miz taking on John Cena for the 18th time in a row, we do get to have the fresh concept of putting R-Truth up against Rey Mysterio in a feud, whereby Mysterio will get to yet again work with one of the faster rising superstars in WWE. Anyone else laughing at the fact that one of the shortest guys on the roster seems to be the proverbial measuring stick?

If you’re familiar with these GuysNation Monday Night RAW columns, bear with me for a minute…

If you’re a virgin in the ways of my recappings, don’t worry, this won’t hurt a bit. Each Monday, GuysNation dives right into RAW as presented by WWE and picks it apart with a shake of the head, a wag of the finger, and the occasional pat on the back.

During the opening, we get the usual look at the signs, and amongst the various shades of “U Can’t C Me” options, we’ve got an early contender for Sign Of The Night (feel free to give me your nominations, btw)… “Superstars Is Zack Ryder”

Worst sign of the night so far: Uncle Beef

Before John Cena can even get started on the mic, Alex Riley steps up and interrupts, mocking John Cena’s typical catchphrases, then shows a hype video which shows that The Miz has won 17 of the past 18 encounters with John Cena. I’m predicting Cena’s going to get scared and let it effect him emotionally to the point where Cena basically hands the belt back to The Miz at Over The Limit.

Wait, you don’t think so?

Anyone else find it ironic that The Miz calls himself “the most must-see champion in WWE history” and his arch rival is someone whose catch phrase talks about not being able to see him?

After John Cena talks for a bit about how the Miz is afraid of him, the Anonymous General Manager speaks up and allows The Miz to pick a match (stipulation and opponent) for John Cena for tonight – so long as it doesn’t involve The Miz or Alex Riley.

Well here’s a shock, The Miz says he doesn’t know what he’s going to do, but he promises it’ll be awesome.

Match – CM Punk vs Kofi Kingston

Early in the match, the announcers mentioned “how would Nexus like it if they were out-numbered?” Then a bit later in the match, CM Punk was outside the ring and the Nexus tried to come to his aid, only to be told to go back up the ramp by Punk… and the announcers barely mention the fact that he wants to go it alone.

With this match not being a title match, was there much doubt about how the outcome would go?

Outcome – CM Punk gets the pinfall after putting Kofi to sleep following Kofi falling off the top turnbuckle

Last Week's Shirt. Spot the Deathly Hallows.

After the match, CM Punk gets on the mic and promises that each member of Nexus is going to prove that they are the most formidable force in WWE… and they started by going after Kofi Kingston? By the end of the night, CM Punk had better at least approach The Miz about having one of the members of Nexus be Cena’s opponent. I’m not saying they should pick a member of Nexus, but at least try.

Match – Kelly Kelly vs Bella Twin Brie

How long until Michael Cole gets on the microphone and interrupts the match, talking about how no one cares about Diva’s wrestling. Is it possible that he mainly does that when Eve Torres is in the ring?

Anyone else wish Kelly would do that “legs around your head and spin” move on you?

So we’re basically just killing time until kHARMa shows up, right?

Outcome – Kelly Kelly gets a pinfall win by roll-up.

Tonight seems to be “challengers win in non-title matches” night.

Oh, here comes kHARMa.

The Bella Twins don’t get to escape so easily this time, and when kHARMa gets into the ring, she starts to go right after Kelly Kelly, but then for some reason the Bella Of Lesser Intelligence attacks kHARMa, and she gets summarily dismissed just like all other aggressive lasses who have attacked kHARMa in the past.

After the Implant Buster on Nikki Bella, kHARMa walks over to Kelly Kelly… and basically just laughs at her after looking her up and down, then flicks her in the head, clearly not considering her any sort of challenge.

You know it’s bad when Alicia Fox is considered a better competitor than you are.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls… mostly “boys and girls”… it’s Rey Mysterio time! Get out your masks, try to get the Friendship Headbutt if you’re lucky enough to be sitting along the isle, because Mr 6-1-9 is on his way to the ring!

Is it a match? Is it a segment? Rey takes about five minutes for his entrance, so it takes a while to find out that he’s getting a microphone, and I’d bet he talks about R-Truth…

Apparently Rey isn’t happy that he got jumped last week after the main event by R-Truth. He says that when he gets passed over for something, he doesn’t get upset like that… Maybe that’s why he had such a long gap between World Title reigns!

Rey should just be happy that Truth didn’t interrupt the match last week to cost Rey his opportunity. At least Mysterio lost free and clean.

R-Truth doesn’t show up when he gets called out… maybe he’s out having a cigarette… and Alberto Del Rio shows up and talks about how Mysterio cost him his opportunity the week before, and says Mysterio isn’t as good as him because Mysterio (as well as the people of San Antonio) isn’t a Pure Mexican.

Rey is proud to be both Chicano and American, and Rey decides it’s time to fight… and because we magically have a referee, it’s ON!!

Match – Rey Mysterio vs Alberto Del Rio

Anyone else thinking that R-Truth is eventually going to be showing up? I’m thinking there’s a chance we’ll be seeing some sort of three-way at the pay per view featuring these three.

Commercial time… and during a match where they’re arguing about being Mexican or Mexi-merican, they show a Taco Bell commercial? Nice timing…

R-Truth finally shows up… he’s in the crowd, he interrupts the match and says that Mysterio stole his spot… and I wonder if they started this whole angle with Rey Mysterio to have someone replace John Morrison and have almost an identical storyline to what R-Truth was going to have with Morrison, because that’s essentially where things have gone with Rey Mysterio.

Outcome – Rey Mysterio wins by DQ because Ricardo Rodriguez gets involved when Mysterio tries to hit the 6-1-9.

Post match, ADR attacks Mysterio, and then shocker, R-Truth rushes in from the crowd and gives Mysterio a beatdown, essentially because his call for the police to show up to “arrest the man who ‘stole his title shot” wasn’t heeded.

R-Truth needs a name for that leaping fallaway armbreaker he uses… and it needs to be something awesome.

SCORE! Backstage, CM Punk talking to The Miz about tonight’s main event against John Cena! I really REALLY hope he picks Mason Ryan!

After the commercial, it’s contract signing time, Michael Cole is in the ring, we’ve got an unfortunate view of Jack Swagger’s crotchel area directly next to Cole’s head… and I’m zoning out and waiting for this thing to be over.

Have you heard the stipulation for this thing? Lawler will induct Cole into the Hall Of Fame if Jerry loses.

After Jerry signs the contract, Cole lets him know that apparently he put in some language into the contract about this being a Kiss My Foot match…. ugh. This better be the last stand…

Wow, for the first time ever, WWE does a rewind going back 15 years, showing when Bret Hart made Jerry Lawler kiss his own foot at King Of The Ring 1995.

I know it’s Hollywood makeup, but Cole’s foot looks FOUL.

The Cole / Swagger rivalry gets a little bit renewed. Lawler gives Swagger some credit for being a former World Champion, and Cole says that no one’s going to remember Swagger as a former World Champion… and Swagger takes offense… leaving Michael Cole all alone.

Michael Cole starts quickly back-tracking, trying to apologize, and this finally does look like the final straw between them… and it also looks like cole might be done as an announcer on RAW.

Apparently at Over The Limit, CM Punk and Mason Ryan will be challenging for the tag straps against Show & Kane… and we’re getting something of a preview here tonight…

Match – Big Show & Kane vs Michael McGillicutty & David Otunga

How about it, 3 minutes before the match ends in DQ?

I suppose the other alternative is that the Nexus guys just get squashed.

Anyone else think that, after he loses to Jerry Lawler at the pay per view, Michael Cole should go around and apologize to all of the superstars in WWE that he did a disservice to while he was his mega heel self?

The match has now gone 4 minutes, with Nexus getting a little bit of offense in there, so I’m a little surprised.

Interesting spots near the end… Mason Ryan drawing Big Show’s attention and getting taken out… Kane thinking he’s got the advantage on Otunga in the ring… only for Punk to sneak up and kick him in the head.

Outcome – New Nexus score the victory by pinfall

Backstage, The Miz is talking to R-Truth about that main event spot, and because it won’t be CM Punk, this could be interesting.

Main event time, and The Miz shows up first, because really, he holds the key to this match – stipulation and opponent.

Stipulation: No Holds Barred Match

Cena shows up, doesn’t look thrilled, but he walks to the ring anyway… but then Jack Swagger shows up and assaults John Cena from behind.

Match – Jack Swagger Vs John Cena

So… Swagger has the chance to become a face, and I suppose someone realized it would be hard to get him over as a good guy when he sounds so rediculous on the mic… so I suppose he’s going to remain in the heel role.

How far into a No Holds Barred Match do we have to wait before one of them does something that wouldn’t be acceptible in a regular match?

Seriously, throwing him into the exposed steel barricade? Hitting Cena with a laptop?

Now Swagger brings in the chair, and I guess we’re getting down to it now.

Just… when… it looks like Swagger is winning the match… YOU’LL NEVER BELIEVE IT! John Cena… he makes a comeback and not only gets the win over Jack Swagger, but he makes the man with the amateur wrestling ability TAP OUT!!

Outcome – John Cena wins by submission

After the match, The Miz goes crazy and starts trying to destroy a WWE camera, then rambles on and on about all the ways he can hurt John Cena on Sunday. The Miz says he won’t be using a pipe on Sunday night, but he’ll be hurting Cena in a way that people haven’t thought about before.

He does decide to use the pipe to hurt Cena tonight, and the attack is on! Alex Riley is in first, giving The Miz the opportunity to be on the attack… and despite hitting Cena in the ribs and the back with the pipe and putting him on the mat, John Cena springs back to life and ends up knocking around The Miz, first with the pipe, and then the two go toe to toe, making me worry about the quality of the plumbing in WWE Headquarters if that’s the quality of their pipes.

And that’s all she wrote for tonight’s RAW, with the tense staredown as they look upon each other for the last time before their impending pay per view battle… unless you count the hotel bar tonight, tomorrow or any other night this week.

Definitely vote in the polls here in this article if you haven’t already, but here are some other items on GuysNation that you might enjoy!

Snack reviews, with dozens of types of chips of all sorts of brands and flavors… from the regular chips you’re used to… to the obscure and adventurous options you might not know what to think of ahead of time!

Think of this as a guide to help you decide what to snack on when you’re doing whatever guy-type activity you’re getting into next!

Click on the bag of Zapps chips to the left to access the various snack reviews here on GuysNation!

Still interested in reading more about wrestling? How about an article on how to save the WWE Tag Team Division! Or what about the increasingly popular Squared-Circle Jerk!

Do you like cars? Check out our resident gearhead, or one of our NASCAR articles!

Love the ladies? Read some rationale as to why Claire Sinclair might not be the best option to be the 2011 Playmate Of The Year!

And if you haven’t seen it yet, FriskyFriday is one of the most popular features here on GuysNation!

Frisky Friday - 3/25/2011 (Click for images)