WE ARE… LIVE! (as live as typing things over two days CAN be… plus whenever YOU people are stopping by to read this.) Welcome back to the column that is so accurate it has been BANNED in fourteen states (nope)… and over six countries! (it hasn’t). This is the column the sports books don’t want you to read! (we’ll be real, we’re not sure ANYONE wants you to read this, but we could really use the content and this guy keeps submitting articles, so what the hell right?!)
WELCOME TO THE OVER/UNDER! Payback Edition! (Yes… the Wyatts are on the poster… Why? Well… ya know… REASONS?! … … … GET WELL SOON BRAY AND LUKE!!!)
As always I’m your Helluva Handicapping Host, Sir Scott M. Hayes! Payback will becoming to you LIVE (much more live than this column) and HYPE (Mojo approved) from the All State Arena in Chicago, Illinois. The show has been racked and stacked. The stories have been pretty good, and truth be told there is an optimism for this WWE Pay Per View-slash-Network Special that hasn’t been felt in a while. Most wrestling fans I polled on the streets (he means comments he read on dirt sheets) – are looking forward to Payback MORE than Wrestemania! (This one is actually true!)
So, let us shuffle off this introductory coil and get to the breakdowns!!!
United States Championship Match (Pre-Show)
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Ryback hates little guys. He also hates wrestling on the main card. He lashed out at current US Champion, Kalisto. They opened Wrestlemania during the 2 hour pre-show before the 4 and a half hour mania… god that was along day… Kalisto scored a bit of an upset win. Since then? Eh… Kalisto hasn’t done much. He did eat a pin CLEAN for the debuting Vaudevillains. He also got taken out in another tag match the Lucha Dragons lost. Then last week on Smackdown this rivalry seemed to rekindle. The Big Guy beat the Little Guy, and we have ourselves the lone Wrestmania Rematch on the card!
FAVORITE!
Ryabck -510. US Championship has absolutely floundered since Cena dropped the belt to Del Rio. The WWE has seemed to lose its desire to make it interesting. This might be a shot in the arm they think it needs, and frees up the Lucha Dragons to fully immerse themselves in the burgeoning tag division.
UNDERDOG!
Kalisto: +200. MMMMAYBE they want to keep the belt on Kalisto? Wouldn’t be unheard of, but they really have NOTHING for Ryback if he doesn’t win here. Kalisto still has a lot going for him and really has done nothing to add to the championship, and wouldn’t miss it if he lost it.
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Over/Under 1.5 “Feed Me More” chants from Chicago.
Chances I I forget this match is on the pre-show. Yes -200. No! +250. NAP! -10000.
Who’s Running Raw on Monday?! (is it me? I hope its me!)
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Shane wrestled Taker for control of Raw. He LOST. Monday after Mania Vince was all, “Meh… go ahead and TRY it. Shows were good. Ratings were… eh… Still the energy was different. Then Steph came back and wanted to control Raw again. Which…. for… REASONS?! – She couldn’t just take from Shane because he had no claim to the brand. So no we’re going to have Vince decide it at Payback… cuz what does every Pay Per View need, but a 20 minute long McMahon in ring segment
FAVORITE!
Stephanie: -200. If they actually follow the story THEY’ve set out? This is the only one that makes sense.
UNDERDOG!
BOTH: +100. OH YES! (You read that in Paul Bearers voice, didn’t you?) – The rumors of another version of the “brand split” are running wild. Makes more sense than the following…
Shane: +400. He. Lost. THE. MATCH! Plus he and Vince were feuding. WHY would vince pick him? As Sam Roberts’ might say, “Because… WRESTLING!”. HERE COMES THE MONEY?! Not if you bet on Shane!
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Non McMahons seen: Triple H -250. Undertaker +100. Cena +200. Finn Balor +400.
Over/Under 18 minutes 44 seconds.
#1 Contender’s Tournament for the WWE Tag Titles (Brought to you by Booty O’s)
Enzo and Cass vs. The Vaudevillains
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Night after Mania, Enzo and Cass debuted and yelled at the Dudleys. The following Smackdown the Vaudevillains debuted. Then? The New Day started an eight team tournament to name #1 Contender’s for the Tag Titles, sponsored by Booty O’s… of course. Both teams looked dominant on their way to the finals. Enzo and Cass getting a clean win over the future Hall of Famers, Devon and Bubba Ray. Vaudevillains beat the Uso’s! They even had a nice in ring promo on Raw… Special Kudos to Aiden English’s mic work there! Added some sizzle to this match. Loved the tourney and the build of new teams. Love they’re fighting for something, and Enzo has been on fire! Chicago will eat this up… HARD. Side note, saw these two teams wrestle during NXT’s live tour in Philly and Asbury Park. Both matches were great. They have great chemistry. One match was played more for comedy. One was a really entertaining straight up tag match. I love both teams, and this could be a sleeper.
FAVORITE!
Vaudevillains -110. Yes. Enzo and Cass have the rocket strapped to their back. I can’t remember ANY talent getting as much mic time as they’ve gotten in their first weeks with the company. BUUUUUT? Better to keep them chasing!
UNDERDOG!
Enzo and Cass: +100. Not HUGE ‘Dogs by any stretch. I just feel like they have a ready made feud with the Dudleys. A nice couple PPV feud with the Dudleys would be good for both teams AND the tag division on the whole. Like the US title match. The entity in the match that has something ELSE to do after the show? Is my underdog. Bet the throwbacks.
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Enzo and Cass open the show: YES, its their wheelhouse! -450. No, Way! +240.
Will Chicago care about the Vaudevillains: OF COURSE, they’re hella snarky -150. NOPE! Sadly, no one outside of Full Sail is gonna care about the Vaudevillains: +230
Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Corbin debuted at Wrestlemania. With little fanfare he entered the Andre Battle Royal… and then? HE WON THE DAMN THING!!! Solid choice, actually. Next night he talked about how he would dominate and what not. He then destroyed Dolph Ziggler. Then he destroyed Dolph Ziggler. Then sprinkled in some Zack Ryder. Now they’re not letting the other one get to the ring to start their respective matches!
FAVORITE!
Baron Corbin -310. Lone Wolf’s debut match on Pay Per View? Yeah. Run with that pack!
UNDERDOG!
Dolph Ziggler: +300. Ziggler is in a fun wins and losses, wise. I don’t expect to see the Showoff, Payoff any adventurous betters.
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Who’s hair needs more work? Corbin: -400. Ziggler: +140.
Dean Ambrose vs. Chris Jericho
HOW WE GOT HERE!
If you want the LONG story? One time Jericho teamed up with Reigns and Ambrose and walked out on them… but I haven’t heard that mentioned. This started because they walked by one another and shared a stink eye, and then Shane gave Ambrose the “Ambrose Asylum”, a talk show to replace “The Highlight Reel”. So they started to beat each other up, and now? We got a nice little match out of it.
FAVORITE!
Dean Ambrose -210. He lost a REALLY, way more than it needed to be, one sided match against Brock Lesnar at Mania. This coming off being the hottest face in the company. #VINTAGEWWE! You’d have to be CRAZY not to bet Ambrose.
UNDERDOG!
Chris Jericho: +200. He is coming off a surprising win over AJ Styles at Mania. Twas a head scratcher.
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Over/Under 18.5 Knife Edge Chops.
Intercontinental Championship Match
The Miz (w/Maryse) vs. Cesaro (w/my heart)
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Night after Raw, Double 0, AWESOME, Cesaro (CE!SAR!O! CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O! CE!SAR!O! CE!SAR!O! CE!SAR!O! CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O!CE!SAR!O!)
Returned! Making this handicapper CRAZY happy! (We the management of this here site suggest you poncho up when Hayes talks about Cesaro). That night Miz challenged Zack Ryder for the Intercontinental Championship. A returning Maryse got involved with Ryder’s dad. Next thing we know? Miz is our NEW IC Champion! He and Maryse have been a great pairing. Cesaro beat Kevin Owens to become #1 Contender, and here we go.
FAVORITE!
Cesaro -110. A slight favorite. Close to a pick ‘em. It’d actually make more sense for Miz to retain, but it’d be AWESOME (see what he did there?) for Cesaro to get this moment in Chicago. Get ready to make deposit in those Swiss Accounts.
UNDERDOG!
THE Miz: +100. Seriously will NOT be surprised if he retains. Let Cesaro keep chasing, or elevate Cesaro to bigger and better things, and let Miz and Maryse hold the IC title until Summerslam at LEAST!
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Over/Under 11.5 Uppercuts.
We going Swinging? Yes! -200. Nope! +150.
Mid Match Makeout break? No -150. OF COURSE +100. It’ll be Cesaro and a fan +500.
Women’s Championship Match
Charlotte w/Ric Flair vs. Natalya w/Bret Hart
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Wrestlemania saw a dawning of a new era. Women would be called Superstars. The Championship was once again the “Women’s Championship” and resembled the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. In the Raw after Mania coronation. Charlotte said some nice things before making it all about her. All the women on the roster walked out on her… and seriously… feels like we haven’t seen them SINCE. Natalya got on the mic and a challenge was laid down. So this title will be defended in a rematch of the NXT Women’s Tournament Finals between these two which also had each of their most famous wrestling relatives cornering them. We’ve hit a lull the last few weeks. Women got… what… 5-6 minutes this week on Raw? AND they were starting an Emma vs. Becky feud, but Emma then loses to Nattie in a few minutes on Raw? I don’t get it… But this match has all the makings of being great.
**UPDATE** Ric Flair has been all up in the news the last 24 hours. He made an unfortunate comment during a Smackdown promo. He then got detained at Logan Airport for behaving erratically. So? We’ll see what this means for the Nature Boy in Chicago.
FAVORITE!
Charlotte -440. Good match, possibly the most predictable on the card. There are THREE possibilities that will take that Championship from Charlotte. Sorry, Nattie. You’re not one of them.
UNDERDOG!
Natalya: +330. She is super talented, and a great wrestler, but isn’t the FUTURE of the division. Charlotte IS part of that future. Future is now.
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Ric and Bret get physical? Yes: -110. No: +210.
Better than their Takeover classic? No: -200. Yes: +130.
Over/Under: .13 for Ric at bell time.
Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens
HOW WE GOT HERE!
Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn are long time friends who seemed destined to wrestle for our viewing pleasure for all eternity. PWG, Ring of Honor, Chikara. They have fought around the globe, stealing shows, and making names for themselves. They both got signed to NXT (Sami a year before Owens.) Sami worked and won the NXT Championship on the night Kevin Owens debuted. Then Owens brutally attacked Zayn during the post match. Owens beat Zayn for that very same championship. Owens ended up on the Main Roster earlier than Sami who tore his rotator cuff. Owens pinned Cena clean. Owens won the IC title. Sami came back, and eliminated Owens from the Royal Rumble. Both men were in the IC Title Ladder match. They’ve continued to hockey brawl and are about to bring their collective awesomeness to a WWE Pay Per View ring. In front of one of the WWE’s smartest crowds. This match has already gotten a NICE 4+ minute hype video slash history lesson. Could and SHOULD be match of the night!
FAVORITE!
Kevin Owens -140. IF someone wins decisively? It’ll be Kevin Owens. This feels like the opening chapter of their book inside the WWE. One that I’d have last until Summerslam for their ultimate blow off (For now… till they’re feuding for the WWE Championship!)
UNDERDOG!
No Contest: +100. I could easily see this match getting thrown out. Double count out. Double DQ. This clash of titans will continue!
Sami Zayn: +200. Sami is perfect chasing. Perfect rising from beneath. Winning here would be shocking, and would make me wonder what their long term plans for these two would be!
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Does Chicago sing “KO” to the “Ole” melody? No… they’re not THAT creative: -240. Of course, they’re totally creative! +400.
Over/Under 3.5 “This is Awesome Chants”
Do I got to bed after this match? Yyyyyyyup: -3000. I’ll be too jacked up on this match and Mountain Dew! -43000!
WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match
Roman Reigns vs. AJ Styles
HOW WE GOT HERE!
At Wrestlemania Roman Reigns won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship from Triple H, and there was MUCH REJOICING! (Clearly he’s being sarcastic… we think) AJ Styles after a hot few months lost, for some reason, to Chris Jericho. The next night Both of these men claimed they wanted a title shot from Reigns. As did the previously discussed, Kevin Owens, and Sami Zayn. So? Shane McMahon made a fatal fourway for #1 Contendership. Everyone thought Jericho might be the guy they put in there. A strong heel to try to keep Operation Face Roman as strong… as they can… (READ: not very!) – but then? AJ Styles won! Interesting choice. Chicago will CLEARLY be in Style’s corner, and Reigns will continue to be booed mercilessly. (See we told you he was being sarcastic earlier.) – But?! The plot THICKENS!!!
Karl and Luke debuted and took out the Usos… Roman’s COUSINS! THEN?! THEY TOOK OUT ROMAN! AJ insisted he has nothing to do with it, despite their Bullet Club history. Roman wasn’t believing it. They continued to cross paths and now we have this really compelling match with all these extra curriculars! Who exactly are Luke and Karl WITH?! Is it AJ? Is it Roman?! Could it be someone else?!
FAVORITE!
Roman Reigns Retains: -500. Its his first defense. He’s already had two short title reigns that got stopped short due to shenanigans. He is calling himself “THE GUY”. Yeah… Betting on Roman is gonna make it Rain!
UNDERDOG!
AJ Styles: +230. He’s had impressive start to his WWE career. Getting this match is quite the capper to his 3 months inside the WWE. That said? He’s probably not going to be WWE World Champion… and more importantly? I don’t think WWE is ready for that.
PROP BET(s) O’ THE MATCH!
Do Gallows and Anderson play into the finish? OF COURSE! -200. No WAY, good brother! +300.
HOW do they impact things? Attack Reigns: -400. Attack BOTH -100. Attack AJ +200. Watch politely from the front row while chanting “YOUNG BUCKS!” +3000.
Hey… What about Finn Balor?! He’s NXT! NXT! NXT! 4life: -250. The Demon is in Chicago!!! +50. What, you mean that Mark Twain Character?! +4000.
There you have it, kiddos! The show looks to be very entertaining. We have big story lines in a lot of the matches. Amazing in ring action, on paper! Could be an early favorite of WWE PPV of the YEAR!
Till NEXT time? … THOSE are the Payback Over/Unders!!! and I’m Sir Scott M. Hayes, xiv. Hit me up in the comments section below or tweet me at @sirmhayesxiv.
