Your relationship problems, fuck ups, and stupid questions are answered by alternative model Angel Amore.

Q

Dear Angel,

I would like to know why when you’re in an argument, big or small, in a relationship do women always have to call their girlfriends and let them in on the situation ASAP. And they seemingly do so with absolutely ZERO regard for the guy’s privacy OR the relationship’s privacy! This little habit which appears to be a steady trait in ALL of them has always baffled me. So please …fill me in!

Sincerely,

“Dustin McCrack”

A

Dustin,

First off; the cleverness of your name just… nothing short of amazing really. Thanks for that. (:

Now getting to your wonderment; excellent question. Us women are complicated right? ….wrong! Well to a degree anyway. Let me elaborate… Males have a tendency to bottle things up, hold feelings inside,  leaving most or all of their real feelings left never to be heard by anyone out loud. Where as (and this is the part you should take note of) the majority of women are almost the exact opposite and like to take a lot of what would be considered “personal” feelings or thoughts and incorporate them into one of many seriously complex layers which make up their social lives.

So typically when a couple is in a relationship and a fight/argument happens they’re both releasing all these intense stressors and feelings and thoughts, but when it’s all over and the dude feels like he just got all this crap off his chest and released a lot of tension and said what he needed to say and now he is content and it’s over with… the chick’s process of releasing all the tension and getting crap off her chest (metaphorically of course! I’m on to you pervs! Hehe) has only begun! YOU may feel all better having gotten that weight off your shoulders but oh man… she is nowhere NEAR feeling that way quite yet.

The next steps are

1. gabbing to her girlies about what happened,

2. receiving feedback on what she should have/shouldn’t have said/done,

3. going back to you and reopening the subject if feedback from girlfriends suggested it be done (which I’m sure you’ve also noticed) and finally

4. Coming to some kind of conclusion/solution with you that’s somewhat amecable (although usually it only has to seem amecable for HER in order for her to get the same content feeling as you had 4 steps ago).

If no solution/conclusion is met you better watch your ass because you fly RIGHT BACK to step 1 otherwise!

As far as the feelings you’re having about her neglecting your privacy goes you should really try not to be so sensitive to that, and for several reasons. If you’re in a relationship with a broad important enough to have a fight regarding things you feel might violate your privacy if shared then chances are you’ve probably been dating for quite a while. Which means, trust me on this, if you’ve been dating that long then chances are that her girlfriends know more about you than your primary physician and your best friend combined do! And don’t act like you didn’t sit around exaggerating in great detail about when you two first hooked up. You know as well I know that you’ve shared a bit of what would be considered “private” information yourself!

 

Q

Hey Angel,

So it feels like one-night stands, “going to drinks” dates, and f**k-buddies are becoming the norm for the 20-30’s age group, and real dating is becoming a lost art. I remember a time when you asked a girl out to dinner, actually talked to them, got to know them, and pursued a real relationship. The new standard sequence seems to be; meet, f**k, and if it goes well repeat until you get sick of each other. I may be old fashioned, but the latter doesn’t sound that appealing.

So in your opinion, should I forge ahead with my antiquated method of dating, or should I bury my decency and join in with the hordes of soulless, heartless sex-zombies out there?

Much thanks,
“looking for a reason not to jump with the other lemmings” from Tempe, AZ

 

A

Dear Confused Chivalrous Arizonian,

Great question! And a subject matter I personally LOVE to talk about in my own time. I too have noticed the days of men walking on the curb side of the sidewalk with a lady linked to his arm, tossing down jackets over puddles of whatnot/barf so his little miss wouldn’t have to ruin her dainty little shoes trudging through it are going the way of the buffalo. Girls are taught now from a very young age to be the aggressor in relationships. Men want a “fun fearless female” as a popular modern culture magazine loves to drill into the minds of young women everywhere. Guys go to the meat-market (bars) knowing little to no effort needs to be made anymore in order to end up in a cab home with a hot broad since they’re expected by society to make the first move now… and second.. and third… but yeah it bugs the SHIT out of me.

When I first moved to the city and was single for the first time since high school I decided to try my hand at the whole “bar scene dating” thing, and I left there at 2 am feeling like a failure and wondering if I smelled or something because NO ONE frickin hit on me! I was crushed! A couple dozen sliders and an order of Greek fries later I started to realize, “oh shit! They wanted ME to hit on THEM!” followed by a lot of “what the hell?!” and “wait.. no way that could be right…”

But so the next night I went out again with my girlfriends and changed it up a bit. I caught some guy eye fucking me and thought “eh what the hell.” And went on to talk to him. “I’ve been checking you out since you came in.”, he said within the first few moments following his introduction. “Really? Then why didn’t you come talk to me?”, I asked in a desperate attempt to comprehend this heavy cultural twist that had apparently occurred that I had been oblivious to whilst doing time in my last relationship. So he goes, “I dunno… That would be weird wouldn’t it”. Well my face’s reaction to his response must have said it all because his interest in me died less than a minute later. Which was fine because mine for him had never even been born, and I just left the bar and never came back.

In my opinion now (and I’m sure if I feel this way there have to be a good percentage of the population of chicks who do as well) since this major shift in human politics has occurred it caused a division of different kinds of people out there. The good news is it might even make it a little more simple for people like you and I to select people worth a damn to get into a possible relationship with, AND for the one night standers it might be even easier! See I think you should stick to your guns. And by guns I mean heart/soul/NOT your wiener and keep that chivalry alive! Because really, where is going with the flow of wam-bam-thankyaMam gonna get you besides itching your crotch in the smelly waiting room of a free clinic? If you actually ARE one of the very…. VERY few dudes who actually wants a real meaningful fulfilling companionship a great relationship with a lady can provide you with then really you are kind of incapable of turning into one of those “sex-zombies”, as you so elegantly put it, when you think about it. I mean don’t take it the wrong way. I’m sure you’re completely capable of F’ing a girl into next Tuesday but I just mean even doing that every single night won’t fulfill you. Which I’m sure is something you already know deep down. So when you walk into a bar and you see a girl standing there who has hair you could see running your hands through, eyes you could stare at for a lifetime, a rack you could eat cheeseburgers off of and the most plump, ripe set of DSL you’ve ever SEEN…. Just spend a minute eye fucking her and if she comes over to talk to you then start the engines! However if your eyes just keep on meeting over and over yet she keeps standing where she’s at… then hope you didn’t bring your Armani jacket because there will more than likely be a bit of whatnot/barf outside the bar…

ALWAYS BE YOURSELF!!!

If you have a problem your “guy brain” can’t solve itself, get in touch with me: AngelAmore [at] guysnation [dot] com

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