Welcome to the first edition of TNA: The Good, The Bad, And The WTF?, the newest wrestling column to grace GuysNation.com. What we intend to do here is not simply tell you what happens in TNA but using my 14 years of wrestling mega-fandom and my habit of over-analyzing things I am going to tell you simply what rocked about the programming and what stunk about it. The highs and lows so you can judge for yourself if it’s all worth your time. Also as the ‘net-loving acronym in my title exclaims I’ll also highlight the segments and angles that make you go “Wait? Did I really just see that? Seriously?”

 

For those you don’t watch TNA programming here’s a quick recap: There’s a big nasty heel stable led by Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff called Immortal that literally runs the TNA-verse. Their main program is called Impact Wrestling! as apparently after nine years someone in the corporate offices realized that “TNA” sounds like T&A and might remind folks of that first year with cage dancers and lingerie battle royales…… Serious Wrestling! Supposedly this is part of a long-term plan to drop TNA as a company name completly.

 

So Yes. Bischoff and Hogan’s nWo… er Immortal runs the show. The champions are World Champion Sting (against Immortal), The X-Division Champion is Abyss (with Immortal), The Legends Title wait they changed it to Global Title oh wait they changed it to Television Title is held by Eric Young, a face that is the best crazy persona since classic Al Snow. We also have the Tag Team Title Champions Beer Money, Inc who are part of a stable called Fourtune that has five members…. and who are the main anti-Immortal forces even though Fourtune used to be in Immortal. Apparently the TNA Originals that make up Fourtune realized helping guys re-create WCW of 2000 wasn’t a great idea.

 

waits for the hate mail…

 

While I’m waiting let’s keep chatting. The TNA Knockouts (Can’t call them Divas) Champion is Mickie James who went from WWE’s favorite former psycho lesbian turned generic smiling face to Hardcore Country. Which is okay because you know you will start singing that theme after hearing it a few times. TNA also has a Knockouts Tag Team Title currently held by IC-only cousins Rosita and Sarita who are part of the other heel stable in TNA: Mexican America. Remember the 80’s when if you were a foreigner you had to be a USA-hating Heel? Someone didn’t tell Russo it is 2011. At least Hernandez’s Border Toss looks freaking brutal.

 

So here’s your general list of G,B, WTF

Good: Mute the TV during the matches. Don’t worry Don West and Taz never say anything important. Just watch the action. 9 out of 10 times what little time they get for matches is full of AWESOME! (not trademarked by Miz Enterprises).

 

Bad: The matches don’t last long enough because Impact Wrestling! is chock full of SEGMENTS! Backstage promos that tell stories that….. rarely enhance the matches. Seriously you’ll spend almost half the show watching Hogan and Bischoff either in the ring or in their offices verbally blowing each other. I said VERBALLY! Relax. Then we have the still-ongoing though no one cares anymore thing with Winter (WWE’s Katie Lea) as some sort of reincarnated lesbian lover of epic crazy proportions to Angelina Love. Remember people if you have loved someone for multiple lifetimes it’s okay to drug and brainwash them.

 

The WTF: Samoa Joe. YouTube him. He may be the greatest wrestler of Samoan blood ever to grace the industry. His in-ring presence could easily become iconic…. Except TNA keeps forgetting to put him on TV, even when he’s in the middle of feuds. Seriously do some internet searching. Joe has a large fan following who wants to see this man on top of every mountain. That fan following includes 80 percent, at least, of regular Impact Viewers and those who order TNA Pay-Per-Views. But they don’t want to make money off of them. W T F indeed.

 

Join us for Edition 2 which will begin the episode-specific analysis and feel free to watch yourself so you can decide what is Good, Bad, and WTF about TNA

 

Since this is GuysNation and since it’s TNA-themed I thought I’d leave you with a little eye-candy. TNA Knockout Tag Team Champions Rosita and Sarita

Rosita:

 

Sarita: