Welcome to the fourth edition of TNA: The Good, The Bad, And The WTF?, the greatest TNA-centric wrestling column to grace GuysNation.com. What we intend to do here is not simply tell you what happens in TNA but using my 14 years of wrestling mega-fandom and my habit of over-analyzing things I am going to tell you simply what rocked about the programming and what stunk about it.
The highs and lows so you can judge for yourself if it’s all worth your time. Also as the ‘net-loving acronym in my title exclaims I’ll also highlight the segments and angles that make you go “Wait? Did I really just see that? Seriously?” Since we know you all want to know about last week before this week’s episode let’s dive right in!
Destination X Qualifier Three-Way or X-Division Showcase as it’s officially called. This week featured the return of three former TNA wrestlers: The awesome Low Ki/Senshi/Kaval depending on what promotion and year (Apparently TNA 2011 is a Low Ki year), Matt Bentley who is apparently no longer a Maverick (well his old partner lost most of his name as he is down to just Kaz), and Jimmy Wang wrestling’s favorite Elvis Impersonator….. who’s not named Honky Tonk Man (He can wrestle I promise so don’t dwell on the gimmick). Matches like these are what TNA needs to do to sell an X-Division PPV. These three guys went out and just tore into each other, making you doubt who would win the entire time.
A BFG Series match that’s actually a singles match! Yay! It’s Samoa Joe and the floundering without his buddy/brother from another mother D-Von. Um… wait. D-Von hasn’t had a singles win on Impact since I think before the Team 3D breakup. Why is he even in this Series? And he beat Joe. Great. They tried to play it off as Joe’s out-strategized himself but at the end of the day an end of his career life-long tag wrestler (we don’t mention Reverend D-Von. Seriously. It’s like the first rule of Fight Club) beat a guy that if the executives listened to the fans would be TNA’s answer to WCW’s dominate Goldberg. Before the streak ended Goldberg and he punched out windows. Oh and later Joe scheduled a bar brawl with Kaz because Kaz heckled him. Wait, you SCHEDULED a bar brawl? I can understand “Meet me in the parking lot” for intense personal stuff like Jarret/Kurt from a while back. But two dudes who have a minor beef fighting in a crowded bar? I hate you Creative.
Hey check this out. TNA has this X-Division based PPV called Destination X. It’s really cool, all the matches are X-Division style. Now you’d think the center-point of this PPV would be a super awesome X-Division Championship match. I mean they’ve always had the belt, why wouldn’t you make it the main event and the most highly promoted match on the show? Because you are TNA. Instead of using this PPV to showcase how awesome this belt is and make the idea of winning it on a night when this style of wrestling is all over the place, you barely hype the match. In favor of matches you couldn’t do last year like RVD/Lynn on the ECW Reunion PPV. Don’t ask, please. It was painful.
So yeah. Champion Abyss is barely there. Sure he got a promo with opponent Kendrick. But it was a backstage segment shorter than the promos to build up any other match. It’s simple. Pick some X-Division Legend like AJ or “Prototyper Xer” like RVD and have them challenge the man who has been claiming for months his reign will kill the X-Division. Every week have Abyss destroy an Xer so fans doubt even a legend can beat the current Abyss. Meanwhile legend and challenger wins his own matches against people who’ve beaten Abyss in the past like Joe and Sting to keep it hard to call leading up to the last week when Challenger gets a pin over Champ in a tag team match. Why Do You Screw This Up TNA?
Another episode of TNA (gets beaten up by marketing execs) I mean IMPACT! WRESTLING that can’t quite figure itself out. At least this is easy to figure out: Angelina Love, Knockout Icon who is in love with Winter. Or just really happy to tag with her. At least she’s not no-talkie brainwashed anymore.