#regimechange: So WWE had two great matches last night in Taker-HHH and Rock-Cena and the ensuing fallout could have opened RAW, but instead they with a shot of both rosters all together in the back. I always think those are incredibly lame because you got heels and faces seated together and it doesn’t really fit with kayfabe for that to happen. The camera does pan over to The Law Offices of David Otunga’s Travel Mug and new uber-GM Big Johnny grinning like tools. Johnny’s speech about being fair and non abusive of his new power was funny, though not as funny as the blank stares he got from the rosters. Of course he then books Santino to defend his US title against both Dolph and Swagger. CM Punk makes up for it by calling Johnny a ‘giant toolbox’, though it was worth it even with him having to defend his title against Mark Henry per instructions of the GM. That’s because we all know Punk will win.
#soakitup: That’s right WWE ‘Universe’, soak up The Rock being here on RAW, because he will more then likely leave to go film his movies and not come back for months, even he said he would never leave. I do like the decision of giving the match to Rock, if only because Cena was built like he was going to come out victorious. Hopefully his response to it is not the usual shrug-his-shoulders-i’m-ok-with-it. He has to come out of this with an attitude adjustment, no pun intended. Not necessarily a heel turn, Vince will actually push young talent before that happens, but something different. Several catchphrases later from later and a mention of getting cut from the Canadian Football League later, Dwayne does get around to thanking Cena without a hint of mockery. He goes to tell us his ‘vision’ for the future, which involves him becoming WWE Champ again…one day. Whether that actually comes true is another thing.
#titleofamerica: So its the Triple Threat US title match and Lawler immediately begins to moan about how unfair it is that Santino is defending against two guys. I’m just happy that the title is being defended at all. Of course Cole comes to Johnny’s defense. It’s a slow paced match to start since Dolph and Swagger take turns beating on Santino and any offense the champ can muster is quickly stopped. The inevitable occurs and the heels argue over who should get the pin. Their bickering allows Santino to get some quick attacks, hit the Cobra on Swagger and retain the title. As the heels threaten Santino, Brodus Clay comes to the champ’s aide, who hits a headbutt on a charging Ziggler in an impressive spot. Any hope of a new direction f0r Clay is squashed when he does his dance routine to celebrate.
#tensaitime: We get the ‘hotly’ anticipated debut of Lord Tensai who comes out in robes and a mask/covering that looks pretty cool. His debut, interestingly enough, is a match, not a promo or run in. The sacrificial lamb for Tensai is Alex Riley, who can at least earn a paycheck from this match. The covering is taken off to reveal, to no one’s surprise, Tensai as Albert, i.e. A-Train. He does look plenty intimidating, with that stare and the Japanese characters on his skull. It’s all power moves from one half of the former T &A with some good selling from Riley. Tensai wins when the ref calls for the bell, but he still gets in a bit more torture in what was a fairly interesting debut.
#fightingchamp: Having Henry be the first challenger to Punk’s title is kind of hard to understand since he didn’t get the pin in the GM tag match. Still hopefully this is the beginning of rebuilding Henry as a monster heel, which he can through a good showing even if he doesn’t win. I also hope Punk calling Johnny a ‘toolbox’ earlier spawns some sort of new shirt. Punk tries to use his quickness to get Henry off his feet, but the big man is in control for a majority of the match. Even the trash talking from Henry is impressive. Punk does regain control after countering a Bear Hug into a DDT, though it doesn’t last for long. Punk rolling out the way of a splash from Henry got the crowd really going, but yet again Henry has an answer in the form of a big clothesline. He is looking more like the Henry of late 2011 and that’s a good thing. Punk tries for his signature bulldog but is tossed out of the ring by Henry and can’t make the 10 count, handing Henry the win 
but not the title. Mark shows his displeasure by WSSing Punk on the outside. To add insult to injury both Johnny and Jericho come out to taunt him. If you thought calling Punk’s family was personal, Jericho ups the ante by pouring a bottle of what looks like whiskey all over The Champ and crushing another against Punk’s skull. As if Jericho needed any more heel heat, but he indeed got it.
#coldopen: Having the opening match at Mania be the WHC match is not a problem, but having Bryan lose it in 18 seconds not on;y does a disservice to Bryan and the title, but to Sheamus as well. I was expecting The Pale One to eventually overcome the sneaky Bryan. Sheamus is barely able to start his promo, before Alberto Del Rio makes his triumphant return. He makes his intentions clear in challenging for Sheamus’ title and how will he get that shot? If he can beat Sheamus on Smackdown, of course. Del Rio gets the Punk treatment as his mic cuts out on him and when he tries to get Ricardo’s, he turns right into a big Brogue Kick. Still, Del Rio hasn’t missed a beat when it comes to the mic as he reminded us how good he can be in a promo.
#bowledover: So Show gets his Mania moment and Cody is left to pick up the pieces. He doesn’t look pleased as he comes out for his match against Kofi Kingston. Nor does he when Show’s music hits and the new champ comes out. His mood gets worse as Show introduces ‘An Embarrassing Cody Rhodes Wrestlemania Moment’ with stills of him getting WMDed. Turnabout is fair play and Cody turns around at the wrong moment, because Kofi pops up with Trouble In Paradise for the win. It will be interesting to see how long Show rubs it in Cody’s face and how Cody will react. Will he chase the IC title or move onto the main event?
#firsthoeski: Eve as a heel sounds promising, but the fact that she’s being pushed in place of the actual champ of the division, Beth Phoenix, is horrible to say the least. At least we haven’t seen Natalya ‘letting one loose’ in some time. Eve’s on stage promo did nothing. We already knew she manipulative and conniving, but having it pounded into our heads will eventually backfire and people will lose interest. Just look at the Funkasaurus.
#buriedtopush: Since Miz got the pin for Team Johnny last night, I wonder if that will help him out going forward. If you just listened to Cole you would think he’ll be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame next year. He faces the man he pinned in the tag match, Zack Ryder. I’m sure we haven’t seen the end of the Ryder-Eve storyline, but I am hoping the way he’s been treated brings out more aggression in The Original Broski. He certainly goes right at Miz from the start. It’s barely mentioned as Cole spends most of the match ranting about how much of a loser Zack is for getting played by Eve. The result is just like last night with Miz hitting the SCF on Ryder for the win.
#calledout: With the way they’ve been promoting that Cena will address his Mania loss, you’d think he was coming out to announce he had found a cure for cancer. I’m sure it’s gotten some excited for the mythical Cena heel turn, but they’ll be disappointed like always. His new Fruity color is green it seems, but a color change is to be expected as he seems to do it every Mania. He certainly starts out in typical Rise Above Hate mode but Cena wonders if this is the time he actually lashes out at the fans. The people in the arena certainly want him to, as they begin a loud Yes chant a la Daniel Bryan. Of course Cena refuses to do so and apologizes for letting everyone down. At least the crowd saves it by getting a ‘We Want Lesnar’ chant going not once but twice. Instead of calling out Rock like they’ve been advertising it, Cena ‘asks’ Rocky to come down to the ring. Lesnar’s music hits and he actually comes out instead of it being a fake out. The crowd pops huge for the return of Lesnar and even more when he F5s Cena to end the show.
