Welcome to Skip or Stay. If you’re wondering if that episode of WWE Smackdown sitting on your DVR is worth watching, or if you should track it down on YouTube, read on so you know whether to skip through part of it or stay watching.

Disclaimer: I skip nearly all hype videos, whether it’s a recap of a PPV, RAW, Smackdown, NXT, a big feud, or profiles of individual wrestlers. If I’ve seen it once, usually I don’t need to see it again.

And now for WWE Smackdown 9/24/2010:

WWE Smackdown

WWE Smackdown

NON-TITLE MATCH: Kane © vs. Chris Masters
–    Battle of the big men here. Kane breaks the Master Lock after much effort early in the match. The match is a bit slow, but hard hitting. Kane hits the choke slam but doesn’t go for the cover. Kane then gives Masters the tombstone piledriver and the referee botches the finish. It’s absolutely astounding this ref botched the pin count. Kane is literally moving Masters’ arms around to do the Undertaker’s signature pin, but the referee is already counting three before Kane even pins down Masters’ chest. Just terrible and inexcusable officiating. I think WWE officiating is at the worst it’s been in years ever since they instituted this “Count a pin fall whenever the shoulders are down” thing. It’s particularly bad when the referee is counting down on a wrestler performing a submission move. That’s not a pin fall. One wrestle has to pin the other to the mat. That’s how a pin works. Post-match Kane cuts a pretty decent promo – 10 years ago I don’t think anyone would have thought Kane would be one of the premiere promo men in the industry, but he is really quite good. However, when he says ‘big brother’ I can’t help but think of this:

Hey Brother

Hey Big Brother

–    Verdict: Stay if you like big men wrestling, otherwise Skip

TITLE MATCH: DASHING Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre © vs. “The Hart Dynasty” D.H. Smith & Tyson Kidd
–    Cody Rhodes and Drew McIntyre come out sporting the new WWE Tag Team Championship belts, which actually look pretty decent on them. I’m assuming this is the Hart Dynasty executing the rematch clause they spoke of on RAW. T-Grish and Stryker are pretty subdued tonight, so this match doesn’t even seem the least bit important. Its kind of odd DH Smith is playing the face in peril but he gets beat up on for most of the match until he can make a hot tag to Tyson Kidd. Drew exposes the turnbuckle and Kidd takes an awkward looking Future Shock DDT to retain.
–    Verdict: Stay if you’re interested in a standard TV tag team match, Skip if you know how this one goes.

SEGMENT: Emo-Deadman
–    Undertaker looks like a sad panda by himself in a stairwell.
–    Verdict Skip

SEGMENT: Del (Taco) Rio
–    Alberto Del Rio is standing over Christian’s body and Christian grabs his arm. This torn pec is putting Christian out of action for up to six months. He’ll probably rush his recovery to make it back in time to play spot monkey in the Money in the Bank match at WrestleMania and collect that pay day.
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: Moving Redux
–    Teddy Long, Hornswoggle, and the Dudebusters are backstage. The Dudebusters are trying to move physically move Smackdown to SyFy. The Bragging Rights trophy makes an appearance as the Dudebusters pack it up. Does anyone remember when Festus and Jesse did this when Smackdown was moving to MyNetworkTV? I think they literally packed up Ryan Braddock and some other jobbers.
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: S.E.S. Breakdown
–    Luke Gallows, with his goatee shaved down to a flavor savor strip, approaches CM Punk in the locker room. Punk tells Luke Gallows he’s not worthy of straight edge and to get out. Gallows chokes Punk against the wall and tells him he’s not better than anyone. Gallows says after he beats Punk tonight he’s going to go out and have a beer to celebrate.
–    Verdict: Skip

MATCH: Chavo Guerrero vs. Kaval
–    Kaval’s stock music theme isn’t as bad as Daniel Bryan’s was before The Ride of the Valkyries. Chavo still looks a little weird wrestling in short trunks. No LayCool with Kaval this week so I take it they’re done with him. Chavo hits the Three Amigos then goes for the Frog Splash. Kaval rolls out and Chavo rolls through instead of hitting nobody. Chavo staves off a possible top rope hurricanrana, then hits the Frog Splash for the win.
–    Verdict: Stay if you want to see a decent TV match, Skip if Kaval losing and not hitting any exceptionally cool spots makes you sad

SEGMENT: Del (Taco) Rio x 2
–    Del Rio is out to update us on Rey Mysterio’s condition. Not much heat for Del Rio tonight other than from a bunch of skinny white kids in the front row. He talks about beating down Christian, and gets no heat. Rey Mysterio’s name doesn’t even evoke a reaction out of the audience. I’m pretty sure you could hear a pin drop in this arena. The crowd doesn’t even cheer when he says Rey Mysterio comes back to Smackdown next week. This is just awful. Captain Torn Pectoral Muscle interrupts this segment. He goes after Del Rio with one arm. Del Rio’s ring announcer gets involved to help Del Rio stave off the attack. A weak looking cross arm breaker, followed by a chair around the arm into the turnbuckle sends Christian off for surgery or whatever. The crowd barely gives Del Rio any heat for this attack until he’s done. Maybe this is just a really bad crowd tonight.
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: Emo-Deadman x 2
–    Sad Panda Undertaker looks too weak to even get up from the stairwell he’s in. Maybe someone should give him one of those meal-replacement-bars or something so he can get a little nourishment in him?
–    Verdict: Skip

MATCH: “The Gate Crashers” Vance Archer & Curt Hawkins vs. The Big Show
–    Oh goodie, another handicap match for Show. Wonder who wins this one. At least Hawkins got rid of the red pants, but Archer is in some speedo trunks showing off more bad tattoos. Archer taps to Show’s Camel Clutch.
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: Swagga
–    Josh Matthews interviews Jack Swagger. Swagger rambles on about Smackdown next week while the Dudebusters and Hornswoggle steal the swagger he brought with him to Smackdown tonight.
–    Verdict: Skip

MATCH: CM Punk vs. Luke Gallows
–    So the SES is officially dead – where does that leave Joey Mercury? Future endeavored? What a mishandled stable this was. This crowd is actually chanting for CM Punk while Punk has Gallows in a headlock.  I don’t see how the crowd is going to accept Gallows as a face – but where would he even go as a heel without Punk?  Gallows is often mentioned by his peers in interviews as being a really underused talent – but I don’t see it. He doesn’t have the moves, the charisma, or the look. I thought he was way better as Festus even though that gimmick was super limiting. Anyway, Punk wins this one with the GTS
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: Emo-Deadman x 3
–    He’s still in the stairwell. He’s still sad.
–    Verdict: Skip

TITLE MATCH: Dolph Ziggler © vs. MVP
–    Vickie Guerrero is out with Kaitlyn, who is looking fine like usual. Dolph comes out wearing some really shitty silver vest and a black dog collar. I’m not making this shit up. Is bondage next?  MVP goes “retro” as T-Grish put it, rocking the terrible red long sleeve outfit with the MVP in circles on the back of it. I guess he forgot his new gear at home or it was in the wash or something. I guess that means its Morphing Time:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrePQ-RHQDM]

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NP0ttQPyo7g]

–    Apparently this is a title match. I guess I must have missed something since the announcers couldn’t make this match sound more unimportant. At one point Kaitlyn tries to help Dolph up to his feet on the outside. Vickie gets jealous and Kaitlyn pushes Vickie down. I don’t understand how Dolph isn’t counted out here with this nonsense. Dolph can’t get his shit together in the ring several minutes after the Vickie/Kaitlyn scuffle, so he leaves and loses via count out, and Stryker tells us the title can’t change hands on a count out.
–    Verdict: Skip unless you want to see Kaitlyn

SEGMENT: Randomness
–    The Dudebusters pack up Rosa’s jump rope. Vickie is looking for Kaitlyn, and The Dudebusters and Hornswoggle lock her up in the moving truck as it takes off for SyFy.
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: Emo-Deadman x 4
–    Undertaker tells someone in the shadows to get out of here. Suddenly he goes into a trance and has the energy to get up. His eyes roll back so I assume he just jizzed his pants.
–    Verdict: Skip

SEGMENT: Kane’s Challenge

–    And Kane is back out to challenge the Undertaker. Kane’s promo is accompanied by music. Ugh. He speaks to his big brother, so I have to pull this up on YouTube:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eo1pkHKHuts]

–    Kane tells Taker they need to take this old school and back to the start, back to the Hell in a Cell. Again, I’ll just put over Kane as a very good promo man and this promo is pretty solid, even with the music. When Kane finishes we get some gongs, some druids, some monk chanting, and a coffin. Kane’s face twitches as he stares at the coffin. The lights come on and Kane opens the coffin, complete with Paul Bearer and urn inside. Paul Bearer sits up and grabs the urn. The crowd isn’t marking out for this nearly as much as they should, but they get pretty excited for the gongs, the blackout, and Paul Bearer with the urn in the ring with Undertaker standing behind Kane. Undertaker unleashes fists of fury on Kane, and eventually Kane runs away. Paul Bearer raises the urn and Undertaker gets on one knee before it. Kane throws a shit fit at the top of the stage.
–    Verdict: Stay, if for no other reason: PAUL BEARER!

Overall Verdict: Skip. All of the wrestling on this show was decent, but really, it didn’t do anything for me. Tonight was full of underwhelming formulaic TV matches of no real consequence. You’re not missing anything in the way of the segments either, aside from Paul Bearer’s return. Let’s hope next week is better, when Smackdown debuts LIVE on SyFy. Though I have a feeling it won’t be much better – Cena will be stopping by and the Nexus is coming, perhaps to tear apart the ring again or something. Maybe we’ll get the debut of Nexus B-Team headed up by Michael McGillicutty and friends.

Feel free to comment with your verdict on Smackdown.